I don't get mad...

I ran only once, and then the heat this week became too much to bear. A/C was konking out...fridges stopped refridgerating...and sweating was an understatement. So I did what any whiney fat person would do; I used it as an excuse to eat ice cream and sit in front of the fan.
Any calories burned during that one fateful day of jog/walking have been replaced (and then some) by the food I've consumed since...however, I'm not going to feel bad about it. Why should I? I had worked long and hard in my youth to be thin and perfect and it was never good enough for those who were important to me, so I've decided that I'm just going to be happy with the body that I've got. So what if there's a soft spot here or there, or if my cellulite shows through my pants. It's not like I'm going to let myself become grossly obese:

The truth of the matter is that I will get things done at my pace, to my specifications, and I have no problem being built for comfort rather than speed. That being said, I'm going to rub my lucky buddha belly and make a wish for cooler weather so I can start enjoying the outside again...*heh*

Random blatherings...

I love the Olay series of body treatments. Today is a Quench lotion day, especially on the dry heels and toes...but mostly on my dry, hairy legs. Yep, it sure was a good day to wear a skirt. *snort* But since I sit behind a desk, no one but me will have to see them (thank god). However, this is not the most important thing about today. Nope, the big deal about today is that it will be Day 1 of my new exercise program. As mentioned before, I have been inspired to start running...all thanks to Carmen Electra and her toit booty. Logically, she should inspire me to do her aerobic striptease DVDs, but apparently she is sending out a subliminal message that simply says "Hey stupid, thanks for giving me your money, now get your fat ass off the couch and do SOMETHING". And so something we are doing. I haven't decided if I will take the dirt road on this side of the highway, where I can jog past golfers and mobile homes, or if I will attempt to cross the highway where I can jog past the new housing developments. Tough call. Either way, if you are driving by, I will be the sweaty, wheezing blob making a small dust cloud down a dirt road. Please don't throw rocks. *haha*

In other news, I am one step closer to putting my house on the market. Paulette & I are reviewing my CMA, and as soon as my dad is close to finishing the eavestroughs, the bitch of a house will be listed. Can you believe it!?! Neither can I. Plans are underway for my Open House Party, and all my beautiful friends will be invited. I'll provide the details once I have them, and then all you'll have to do is RSVP! Stay tuned for further information.

Continuing on with my random blatherings, I would just like to tell you how giddy I am about my current job situation. Not only do I greatly enjoy my current assignment, but I love the fact that Office Team loves me! They seem to have me at the top of their list, as I am never waiting for work. I guess it helps that I'm not picky, and I never leave in the middle of an assignment. The perfect girl Friday. I'd recommend it to anyone who was tired of the same old stuff, day after day, but it takes a pretty open-minded and flexible person to enjoy this sort of work. Luckily, I'm that girl. *wink*

So that pretty much sums things up for now. I hope you've enjoyed this episode of Kim's brain farts, and tune in later for the next exciting episode.

Oh yeah, mother nature decided that I was going to start a day early, so thank god for spare tampons in the running bag.

I almost forgot to include a title!

I decided to start watching my Carmen Electra Aerobic Striptease DVDs last night. I grabbed a soft drink and my trusty bag of roasted chicken flavoured potato chips, and had a great time sitting there... sweating in the humidity. It occured to me that I need to find the motivation to get up and move, and by watching a video of skinny people selling themselves like whores, I have finally found my power: tomorrow, I'm going to walk during my lunch hour. See? I spend $50 on a DVD set only to be motivated to walk outside for free. Who knew?

On a different note, I tested a theory tonight to prove that my body can fit through a very small opening. In an effort to avoid waiting for daddy to finish building his "scaffolding of power", I scooted up into my nasty attic so that I could put some brown stain around the new dormer window. From the ground, it didn't seem like it would be that difficult to fit through it. In fact, it was a lot easier getting out than it was getting back in. I came to the conclusion that, should I have gotten stuck, I would never hear the end of it from my neighbours AND I would probably have a picture or 12 circulating through the internet in a matter of moments (all with my consent, of course). With a lot of sweating and grunting, I did manage to ooze back in through the window, nearly losing a breast in the process. At least, I believe it was my breast...

So that's my blip for this evening. It's by no means intelliigent, but I hope you can at least find some humour in it. Enjoy.

Hmmm...

So it turns out that the bf was a victim of debit card fraud this week. I'm assuming that since it was the bank that identified the problem (and subsequently cancelled his bank card) they have most likely secured the instant teller that was afflicted. It's such a shame that people have to waste good brain cells concocting gadgets to steal money. Why is the world full of so many people who lack a decent work ethic? Sure, I've relocated a few office supplies over the years, most of the legitimate from the department closure at Assante, but I'm the first to admit that I'm no angel. However, I'm also the first person in line to donate to a worthy cause, or give a friend my last $5 because I know it would help them out. I consider it karmic balance.

Anyhow, I'm happy to report that the exterior house painting project has begun and will hopefully be finished sometime soon. I say that lightly, of course, as the original plan for this house was to do some minor renos, add some fresh paint, and sell. That was 2 years ago. For those of you who have followed this story in MySpace, you know all about it. I don't need to re-live the stress of explaining it all over again here, so you'll just have to trust me that this "job" has been a real bitch to get through.

On that note, I'm going to get back to precariously perching myself on the roof of the porch to paint a second coat on the upstairs window frames. If you happen to drive by, please let me know what you think! *haha*

A bird in the hand becomes two in the bush...

As I was watering my newly-grown grass this evening, I noticed a little bird hopping through the soil in front of my house. It was just a wee bebe birdie, with new feathers on its wings and legs that were too big and wobbly to stand on. I know I should have let nature take its course, but you know me...a stray bird is still a stray.

So, after some debate, I placed the bird in a tissue box and covered it so that I could hopefully reunite it with it's family in the morning. Later on into the evening, my critter cat was sniffing around my front steps when he suddenly grabs something that starts chirping. Turns out we have wee bebe birdie #2 to contend with. So, after retrieving said bird from the clutching jaws of my cat *giggles*, I proceeded to place him in the same box as the other bird. What are the odds that they are from different nests? They're probably talking about their evenings as we speak, formulating a plan of escape. Good luck.

Anyhow, I have no idea how I'm able to even write something at this ungodly hour (it's 1:43am) but I figured I had at least one brain cell left to manage the task of typing. Urg...sleepy. Hopefully, my wee birds will survive the night and I'll be able to grab some photos of them in the morning. They are SO cute! Just wait and see...

For the birds...

It's 6:22am and I've been up for about half an hour, thanks to my whiney cat. It could have been the chirping of the birds too, but we'll blame the cat because he's left the room to sulk.

ANYHOW, I took the opportunity to let the bebe birdies out this morning and I was very happy to see them hop off into the bushline. The one who was slightly mauled by the cat last night was a little slow off the mark, but seemed to have managed. I sat out there for a bit to hopefully catch the reunitement, but alas...I think they were waiting for me to go inside the house first. Surprisingly, I did learn the bird-signal for cat, or at least "danger", as I had let the cat out for a breath of fresh air after I lost sight of the bebes. He was laying down in the planter and enjoying himself while the birds were definitely yelling something. I sent him back into the house again and it stopped. I rule for understanding bird. *sqwawk* Better still, those sounds stopped and I realized that I wasn't considered a threat.

I think today I'm going to buy some birdseed.